Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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