everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
