Don't you send me to vm
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
