Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
