But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
