is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
My vagina is officially offended.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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