bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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