fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
