You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
