If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
