i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
