Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Will you blow on my dice?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
