I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
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