Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize