i dont even know how to be here
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
