i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
We have so much sex to catch up on
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
