I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
