No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
