He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
