Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
