Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
