he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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