i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
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