any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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