these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
