Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
