So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I want her autograph on my taint
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I can't turn off my feet"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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