Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
