i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Text me some of your sweat
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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