whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
