remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
