Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
