How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
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