so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
