Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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