is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
