i was born a porn star she said
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
