whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
