i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
The power of my boobs compel you
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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