i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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