if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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