Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
