May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
