You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
