I showed him my bush... on skype.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
