If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
