I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize