How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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