I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
are you so shy because you have an std?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
