put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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